Tonight I spent some time grieving the death of Grandmama.
I’m not sure where it came from. I think it was because I was setting out to write a post about “grieving” in general. We just got back from an incredible trip we went on with incredible people, and there is now a time of grieving the fact that that trip is over.
I realized I hadn’t written a blog post since Grandmama’s death. Not a real one anyways.
Maybe it is because she commented on every blog I ever wrote. Not usually on the website, but in a private email or text or phone call to me the next day.
Maybe I just couldn’t bring myself to stare that truth in the eyes until now.
I could write about a lot of things related to her.
Her brownies were out of control. And I don’t have much of a sweet tooth.
How many other people would go to their Grandma’s house to watch a football game and be outcheered by her?
Her undeniable love for little children that was evident by the fact that she kept every scrap piece of everything if it could possibly one day be made into something to use to teach a children’s Sunday School lesson.
Her refrigerator in the house and the one in the garage always full of at least 3 different kinds of soda. One time I asked her about the stockpile of cans that never fell below 30+. “They aren’t for me. They are for whoever comes over here. You want one to take with you?”
Instead of rambling on, I’ll share with you her last email to me. After every blog I posted she would always send me an email about it or call me to chat with me about it on the phone.
No matter what the situation was, Grandmama always placed great value on my life. She always was encouraging towards me. Literally, always. I can’t say that about anyone else. Meaning, there were multiple times she went out of her way to say/write something uplifting to me that was totally unnecessary. Here is the last written thing I got from her:
Your “Journey” is really awesome, and thrilled my heart with your singing. I dont know if I ever told you how much your singing has touched my heart. I’ve shed many tears not just with your singing, but the words that came out of your mouth. God’s songs have always been a huge part of my life, and I’ve shed many tears over them. Sometimes it’s in worship service, sometimes riding along in the car, sometimes while working around the house, and sometimes just sitting quietly and listening to what He wanted me to hear. I know you will use the talent God gave you in His timing, but in the meantime He wants us to Psalm 46:10.
I am so thankful to God that He gave you to me, a wonderful grandson in so many ways. I am so thankful that you love our Lord and truly want to live your life for Him and do whatever He leads you to do.
I love you and Brittany more than I can put in words.